[ She's not sure what she feels as she listens to her words. The guilt, the confusion, the shame that she felt; the part of her that still loves her so deeply wants to tell her it's okay, that she hasn't done anything wrong, that it makes sense that she couldn't handle all of Chloe's grief and anger from a distance - not when she could barely handle it herself.

But the anger is still there. The abandonment. The fact that she hadn't pushed through when she needed her most and just dealt with the discomfort that came from talking to her when she was at her worst.

She feels her hand squeezing into hers, sure she'd leave a mark if this was real. Is it real? She's never been so honest before. It doesn't feel like a dream anymore. It feels like an actual explanation. Her head is pounding and her throat hurts from trying so hard to hold back tears. ]

Trying was all I wanted. Just hearing your voice. It was enough. [ At least enough to get her through the day. Maybe not enough to make it all feel better, but nothing ever would be. ] It would still be enough. As pissed as I am, if you called tomorrow, I'd pick up and pretend like nothing ever happened. [ Her voice cracked, eyes shutting, her own hand clenching down roughly on her friend's. ] I just miss you, Max. Everything's gotten so fucked up and all I want is my best friend.